The most important thing about me is that I love Jesus with all my heart, soul and mind. At a young age, I accepted Jesus “into my heart”, which for me just meant that I didn’t want to live my life without Him, and I wanted to go to heaven when I died. Since then, I’ve learned the importance of putting God first in everything, and how to trust God no matter what.
That doesn’t mean my life has been free of trouble or free from dark moments. I’ve had insecurity issues, marriage strain leading to a separation, church struggles, financial difficulties, caregiving for elderly parents, and then all the little things that can get you off track, rock your world, and get your eyes off the Lord.
And then of course the diagnosis of a rare Stage 4 cancer. You can see a timeline and where that fit into my life here.
One of my biggest carry-ons that I took into adulthood and unpacked all over my family and friends was my insecurity and deep need to be accepted. Because I didn’t feel acceptable, I closed myself off from everyone until I felt comfortable. I was shy around groups, and people had to enter my world to get me to open up. When I read the following verse, it changed my whole perception of my interaction with the world and it became my life verse.
“If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it.” Matthew 10:39
And now, I do my best to “give myself up” to people, and not make them work so hard to get to know me. It’s so much more fulfilling!